3 Day Weekend Roundup-Sans Joshua

It has been quite the week! Remember that post about me getting all the Noah snuggles since Josh is gone for the week? Well i’ll just go ahead and say that snuggles were had but not to the extent I had planned. This morning we flew almost literally out of the house because Noah had to be dropped off with his Titi and Uncle in Reche Canyon. Quite a bit into the mountains for those of you who aren’t familiar.

I hate rushing. Espcially with Noah. he gets anxious obviously because I am and he just doesn’t know what to expect next since we’re running around crazy so I have to stop myself in the middle of the chaos and sit down. Even for just 5 minutes and tell him I’m sorry for rushing. Even those few minutes sitting down with him immediately calms him. If you parents take anything away from this post, it should be try not to rush with your kids. They can feel the anxiety.


I’m really happy though because I feel like Noah and I are gaining traction with our bonding time. Since I work a full time job, it can be difficult for baby and I to find little things for us to do just us. Him and Josh have PLENTY of things that they do together because they have all day.

My thing with him? Making sure he knows he’s included in the home rhythm. Traditionally it is up to Mom to include children in the home rhythm but I’m not home! So these times are so intentional!


Weekend Round Up:

Lake Arrowhead and Sis/bro in law time was had and Noah got time with his cousin. We sat by the water, went to the park and ate all day! We did nothing. It was quiet. No traffic and all the stars. Everything I needed to detox from in the city.

Birthday brunch was had for Koko! Happy birthday best! My best and God mama to Noah and most recently new roomie for the next year! We’re both going to buying our first homes next year so this year it’s time is triple up on savings!

First day of homeschool curriculum. We are using Habitat Schoolhouse. Read their blog on this wholesome concept. I’m so excited to integrate this into our rhythms at home. How will I homeschool when I work FT? Good question! I’m still figuring it out but I’m gonna make it work. I’ll make a post on our progress once we get into the swing.

We tried Plant Power for the first time. They opened one in Redlands so holla! We were stoked. That chicken and waffles sandwich though….

All this followed by a 3 hour nap and some park time.

Now I’m sitting in bed with Noah who is in the lightest of sleeps. Josh should be home any minute and I think Noah is secretly waiting up.

How was your Labor Day weekend with your littles!?

XO,

GV

Chapter 32

It’s kind of crazy turning 32. I distinctly remember feeling that this particular age was so far away so I basically felt like I blinked and here I am: grad school graduate, married 5 years, and baby boy that’s cuter than I could’ve ever asked….and turning 32. When I thought about my 30’s I always imagined, I’d have it all together. That there was this grand plan that plateaued at 30 and that was the epitome of being a grown up. Boy was I wrong! And I’m so glad I was wrong.

I am still growing, but I will say since I did enter my 30’s, I’ve learned the art of self-reflection. This is a difficult piece of maturity that can be chilling when we search within to find out who we really are and sometimes we come face to face with the fact that we need to change. I never thought I’d be in my 30’s and be a completely different person and in many ways I’m still that 22 year old girl who can get wild when the mood strikes. But those raw parts of me, the parts that never allowed vulnerability, seeing it as a weakness, yet self-criticism was a ritual for me, I not too long ago was faced with challenges that forced me to look at who I truly was and really just started asking myself, “Giana, is this who you want to be?” The answer was no for the most part, so I changed my habits, my thoughts and perspectives. I realized the power of choice and my GOD was that freeing. We all know we have the choice to do or be or say things we want, but have we really ever taken advantage of those choices and actually made them? So what choices have I made ushering me into the 32nd chapter.

  • I have made the choice of happiness. I am choosing to be happy, regardless of circumstance and situation.
  • I am choosing my husband-everyday. Because that’s what marriage is. The choice to love that person every damn day until you die. And I happily make that choice. (We’re renewing our vows soon btw! Stay tuned.)
  • I choose freedom in faith. My unwavering faith in God knowing He’s got me. No questions asked.
  • I choose to create time, instead of complaining that I don’t have it.
  • I choose to be present. Making eye contact when my son calls my name, leaving my phone in the other room while I play with him or put him to sleep.
  • I choose to pour myself into every facet of life where my passion leads.
  • I choose to share. I choose to share my experiences, lessons I’ve learned, the times I’ve fallen. Because mistakes are what make us great. And hiding those mistakes in shame does no one any good.
  • I choose to learn. I choose to accept that I don’t know everything and that every moment is an opportunity to grow.
  • I choose to be brave-standing firm in who I am, drawing boundaries, and demanding self-respect. From strangers, friends, and family. It’s important to see that there are limits to what we accept into our spaces.
  • I choose to see each road block as a redirection to something better instead of using my energy to move it.
  • I choose to see every person I meet and everyone in my life as a teacher with a lesson. Whether they see it that way or not. I choose to ask myself what I can learn from every encounter.
  • I choose to let my curls be crazy sometimes and not really care.I choose to see make up as an addition to beauty and show my son a woman’s natural beauty.
  • I choose to accept the responsibility of being a mother and understanding that sometimes it means putting myself, my well-being, and mental wellness first.
  • I choose to be my best everyday and I choose to understand that my best each day can look different.

That being said, hello 32!

XO,

GV

Simplicity Parenting-Pt. 1

I absolutely loved Simplicity Parenting! I have finally finished one of the best self-improvement parenting books on the market! Since becoming a parent and learning about who my child was I quickly began to realize we’re all just winging it. However, there are certain tools that we can all learn from each other or others who have studied children throughout careers. Of course we all have different goals and ways that we parent and how we would like our children to turn out so for us, we want to raise a well-rounded human, respectful of others, and loving, creative and all the things we see he has the potential to be. So it is our job as parents to nourish those abilities and there are certain things we can do to encourage them.

This was pretty lengthy and I took so many notes that I have had a hard time putting this together efficiently for you guys. But here it goes!

The most definitive take aways I gathered were the following:

  • Minimize Options: Toys, activities, etc.
  • Simplify Surroundings: Child’s space, food options etc.
  • Be as predictable as possible: Prepare the child let them know what to expect.

Now let me elaborate.


Minimizing Options. Many of us have toys on top of toys. Some from grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles, collections form birthday’s etc. We accept graciously, child is happy for maybe 24 hours to a week and then interest is lost and quite possibly so is said toy. Parents this is the hard part-parting ways with the unnecessary. So how do you determine what is not needed?

  • Remove age-inappropriate toys. If your kid is 3 and there’s a teether in their room. TOSS. You get my drift.
  • Reduce emulating toys. Toys that look like cartoon figures are discouraged in this book because it can replace the space for creativity, but it’s based on preference which is why I say reduce and not remove.
  • Remove toys that make noise or light up. These are highly stimulating. Stimulation is good, over-stimulation can have effects later to where kids learn to expect entertainment at all times. Besides, I have yet to meet a parent who adores their baby’s toys that play the same jingles over and over.

When minimization is occurring you may be wondering, well what will entertain my child? The answer I found is you. Your home. Involving the Noah in the home rhythms has helped exponentially. Invite them to help with the dishes, picking up around the house, make it an activity. Children enjoy being apart of something. Ever notice how they start getting psycho when you’re on the phone or cleaning up in a frenzy, they suffer from FOMO!  ItHelping a child learn his/her place in their home is settling. Gives them a sense of belonging. Instead of saying “you need to clean the dishes now!” I invite Noah to help by saying, “would you like to be my special helper with the dishes?” Telling him he’s my best helper is music to his little baby ears.


Simplifying Space. This might’ve been the toughest spot for us. Noah’s space is a full room right now, yet his bed is in our room, yet we co-sleep for right now. Noah’s room has a small bookshelf, chalkboard eisle, toy box, and a closet. That’s it. which we have turned into a reading corner. Simplifying the room just making things accessible and minimal helping the child learn to focus. What we did: we turned the bookshelf into a reading corner. We have removed MOST books and have left 5.  Those 5 are in the rotation for story time. (More on stories later)

The toy box is full. We, to be honest, are still working on this part of simplification. Stay turned. The idea is to have age-appropriate toys etc (refer to toy minimization above).

When you are simplifying, ask yourself evaluating questions.

Evaluating Questions:

  1. Is it developmentally appropriate?
  2. Is it based on a product or TV show? (Keep an “ad free” zone. Kids are 80% the target audience for products)
  3. Does it tell an unfolding story or is it all over the place? Does it nourish the child’s dreams? Does it encourage the child’s positive play.

Predictability.

Family rhythms are key. Children thrive off of the expected. This has been and is currently the absolute hardest piece of our daily lives because of Josh’s school/clinical schedule and me working full-time, it has been incredibly difficult to determine predictably. This is the reason I picked up this book, because our family rhythms were off and I could see my little boy being shuffled about, from daycare, to my mom, to godparents picking him up, I needed help. So I’m here to tell you no matter how busy you are, this is possible! The busier your life is, the more they need YOU the parent to be transparent.

  • Start at any point to develop a rhythm. Find points in the day that they can learn to expect. For example for us one was waking up and having prayer and saying what we’re grateful for. He expected this.
  • Create visuals. Help them pick out their outfit for the next day. They will be prepared knowing what they’ll wear this brings comfort. Tell them who is picking them up. Include them in the process. Noah is only 3, so this is slightly less of a conversation, but for an older child this will bring less anxiety.
  • Recap their day in the morning. We tell Noah, what’s happening from the point I’m dropped off at work to the point of when I get home. He asks A TON of follow up questions-questions I now call comfort seekers. Try not to get frustrated (I know it’s hard), but remember he is just trying to understand his day. Involving Noah in dinner process helps as well because he KNOWS he is needed.

I have 2 more  points to address: Sleep and Food. These points are the most sought after pieces of advice that I have personal sough as a parent so I’m sure many other parents are just as curious. How can we make both of these very vital pieces of our children’s lives, simple and efficient? Part 2 will be saved specifically for these two bad boy topics. Please do not hesitate to reach out with questions or how we’ve implemented some changes in our home. We’re all in this parenting thing together! To purchase follow link here and enjoy the learning process of raising tiny humans!

XO,

GV

A Weekend Wonderland

Ahhh the weekend. Yes I know it’s Tuesday and I’m already counting down to the 48 hour break! If you read in my latest IG post, you’ll catch the drift that our schedules during the week are crazy and can feel slightly chaotic. But now that Josh is graduated and just studying for the NCLEX, we’ve had a nice streak with consistency. However, I’m still working “9-5” (sometimes later) so my time with family, especially my baby is cut waaaay down. It sucks, but I don’t dwell. Instead I make the most of the time we do have by creating value in our activities.

Last weekend, as we do every weekend we woke up slow. We let morning light in and let the sun wake us up-the alarm clocks become a distant memory. Coffee is made and our little boy is as ready as ever to enjoy both of his parents. Even just the potential of a beautiful day brings peace.

The time i feel is so precious that I get with him and very delicate that I want to maximize our experiences together since it’s so little in the grand scheme of life. I try to make a point for us to be outside with no toys to leave room for conversation: you would not believe the things you can learn from a toddler if you just let them talk!

This particular weekend, I took Noah to Prospect Park and Ford Park in Redlands, CA. A suburb just over an hour outside of L.A.

Such beautiful places and little ducks Noah could feed which made it a first for us. So our weekends? Slow, mindful, minimal. Very buzzword-y but honestly that’s what we aim for. With the whole week of going and coming, we like to leave room for calm and reconnecting. How? We get outside. So if you’re like me and attempt to soak in every waking, free minute you get with your family and babies- go outside, make no plans, and create the space to make lovely memories.

XO,

GV

What’s the Big Idea?

I do have to credit the title of this post to my child since he seriously says “What’s the big idea?” He got it from Mickey………Anyway!


They (whoever they is) say that everyone comes up with a million dollar idea at least once in their lifetimes. I completely believe it because human beings for the most part are highly intelligent however, that intelligence can be misused for which we’ve sadly witnessed. But ideas are magical moments, because just for a second you have something new and brilliant that you thought of on your own. However, most ideas remain ideas and thoughts just holding all this magic that don’t get to be shared with the world.

We all seek knowledge and thrive off of production and progress which is why when we have an idea or thought full of fabulous potential we have that rush of inspiration. I believe where we get caught up is converting that idea into action. Manifesting it into reality which is the trickiest of all. Because in our heads, it is one thing in theory, but out loud, on paper, in front of us, it is another being. So how? How do we bring these ideas to the world to share?

  • Break through the fear. So what if you think someone wont’ receive it the way you want them to or if someone believes it’s useless? Do you.
  • Make time. MAKE time. We have the ability to create most of anything we need if we are resourceful enough. Even time.
  • Start sharing. It doesn’t need to look or sound a certain way. Let it evolve organically. The worst part is watching someone else do what you want to do or what you just started doing because then you begin to compare and the belief system shifts to thinking it needs to be where they are. Nope. Nope. Nope. You don’t know where they started and how they ended up here.

I literally wrote these steps for myself January 3rd, 2018 when I annoyed myself of complaining of not having the time or not being in the right place to start what I wanted. If you want to write, write. If you want to be something or start a career change research. The best ideas have begun with a standard Google or Pinterest “how to…” search. Do it. We ALL have something wonderful and amazing to share and to know that is where it starts.

XO,

Gi

Take Away Time and Why You Need One

We are currently in a state of seasonal bliss. (exhibit A: Us in a standard prom pose)

I define seasonal bliss as moments and time periods in life where you just feel at ease and everything has aligned. I rarely like to get super comfortable in this type of season, but I do by all means enjoy the peacefulness. Post graduation offers us some solitude in the fact that we can expect no major schedule changes, baby is with daddy during the day and at night Josh studies for the boards. I go to work and come back home and our weekends are for recharging and adventure. So here we are. We can expect things to change slightly once he’s on-boarded with his new job and new schedule and then we will need to revamp the setting again. But what can we learn from the last couple of years where we’ve had to adjust to one income, learn to parent, and still stay happily married? I always like to look at take aways whenever the dust settles and seasonal bliss is the perfect time to do so. They help gain perspective and they’re actively setting yourself up for success the next time chaos ensues.

 



♦♦A few aways from the last 2 years♦♦

1. Expect everything and nothing at all. We expected things to be structured and pretty much laid out and they most certainly were not. It was crazy how caught off guard we were and then just forget it when I started working again I think that’s when our whole world just did a 180. So that being said learning to just expect things to happen along with slight inconveniences. The element of surprise won’t be as strong and you’ll be more apt to respond instead of react.

2. Make peace with the process. This happened later on in the game because literally every 10 weeks when Josh’s schedule for class or rotations changed it honestly enraged me. Illogically of course I realize that now! But I really had to force myself to just accept this is what we chose when we agreed for him to go back to school so that was it. Either I could be psycho and complain or just shut up and figure out the next move. I’m actually annoyed at myself thinking back about what I complained about.

3. The tribe is everything. We really wouldn’t have been able to make this work without some very important and key people. From picking up Noah from daycare to watching him and feeding him just most of it surrounding the care of our baby they helped so immensely. And then there’s the ones that were there for us for meltdowns and disappointments not to mention tears and desperate calls. We all need a tribe that only works to support each other without judgement. The eminence of these few is immeasurable.

4. Be a team!! Oh my goodness the most obvious yet difficult component in all of this! Instead of fighting together we often fought against the other. Of course this came from stressors from work/school and frustration and the overall climate of life at the time, but it is counter productive if not done properly. Always remember you and your partner are here for the same thing working towards the same goal. Never forget that. Be attentive. Be mindful. Be supportive.

7 Years a Crazy Woman

7 years graffic

Through the last couple of years, we have been through moves, marriage, more moves, a baby, job changes, and more moves. Did I mention moving? I can’t tell you enough how much transition our little family has gone through since the early years of it’s creation.

Why does this matter? Because I personally know so many of you, and those I know no so personally experience transition and change and bumps and sometimes chaos. It can be hard feeling like you can’t keep up with Jones’s, let alone yourself. Our timeline? Let me share so that you know that I understand how you feel!

2011: Moved back from AZ to CA.

2012: Got engaged -Josh moved to CA and then back to MD to accept a new fantastic job.

2013: Got married in October. I quit my job of 2 years and moved to MD 2 months later. Moved into a condo. Our favorite place we’ve ever lived in! Our first home together.

2014: Started working a new full time job and then we had a moment of peace and quiet. UNTIL! I got pregnant with Noah.

2015: Gained 80 lbs and gave birth to a 9.6 ounce baby boy that Summer. I quit my job 1 week before I was set to return to work. Also, we reevaluated and really decided that it was best I stay home with the baby. This particular time was tough because Josh was working 60 hour work weeks and was gone a lot. We reevaluated AGAIN and came to the conclusion he should continue nursing school for better schedule and $$ so that I could work part-time. We prayed and prayed and we were led to Loma Linda University School of Nursing where Josh was immediately accepted all credits transferred. To us prayer and positive thinking believing people, this was the sign we needed. But wait. LLU was in CA. We were in MD. Moved again. Cross country. The two of us and baby in tow. Shipped two cars and moved in with my mother for 3 months.

2016: Moved to an apartment closer to campus because Josh was doing a 3 hour round trip drive every day at 5 am. By this time, Noah was 9 months old when I was being recruited by my old job (see 2013). We decided at least one of us needed to work so back to work I went. Full Time. Worst nightmare literally until recently. Why? I’ll tell you later. Oh yea, we moved again into the house we currently live in now! Haven’t moved in 2 years which I consider a deep win!

2017: Worst. Summer. Ever. Transition sucks. Mom guilt. Nursing student. Husband and wife=ships passing in the night. Growing toddler. We struggled like for real for real. Almost fully separated. It was awful. There is clearly more to this but I’m setting this up. Bear with me.

2018: Present. Peace finally. Love restored. Josh graduates in 1 week. We will be looking for a place and things have finally settled.

Why is this necessary? Because I want to share that no matter what, no matter how many transitions you go through there is a light at the end of the tunnel! It might be dim, but it still shines. So how do you deal with change and transition without completely losing your mind? Stay tuned!

XO,

Gi